Sunday, July 17, 2011

Carried Scars


Last night when my eyes crinkled shut
I fell into a dream
starting
sl
ow
ly
then fast as
a white rabbit darting
I was
fa
ll
ing
Then I saw you checking out books
for the girl (in the blue sweater)
I paused
cap
tiv
at
ed
by the thin threads of gossamer
sunbeams twisted round
and
en
tan
gl
ed
in your voice as you asked the girl
(her eyes were red from crying) if she was all right
I
hov
er
ed
I watched you but you didn't see me
I was in my own dream not yours
and
dr
ea
ms
hardly ever touch they're
countries surrounded by palisades of mist
a
hun
dr
ed
miles thick a thousand miles strong
and mist can burn like fire
I
sh
ou
ld
know I carry the scars with
me as you carry your kindness

(close at hand, close beside
forever upon forever)

13 comments:

  1. love it, amazing...

    welcome share it with us tonight.

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  2. Wow... to carry scars, yet mists paint the air... burning with desires of futures. Awesome piece.

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  3. This is so beautiful.. I really liked "sunbeams twisted round and entangled in your voice as you asked the girl
    (her eyes were red from crying) if she was all right"

    and
    "I should know I carry the scars".
    Those lines go straight to the heart. Thanks for posting it!

    (I've just read Blackbringer, too. (saw it on your reading list)Agreed, so good!)

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  4. The hurt of her love for him is palpable and I loved the fragments of words in her dream like state.

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  5. This really takes us - and your writing - in a new direction Abigail. I love the play with format. A real nod to Alice. It is like falling letters on a page being detached from the world and others by the dreams in our head - you captured it perfectly and uniquely. One day they will see each other..Jae

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  6. Dreams, countries surrounded by palisades of mist. They are, come to think of it, they are.

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  7. This is deep and I like the emphasis on specific words.

    Wonderful composition!

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  8. this took my mind places. Loved it .

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  9. Those words give rhythm! Awesome!

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  10. Lovely imagery and I also like how you let the words 'fall'.

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  11. profound poetry.
    welcome writing for short story slam week 6 today.

    ReplyDelete